Monday, July 30, 2018
Happiness--a Choice
A common question or comment
involves how a person can find happiness. Since happiness is a personal
perception, no one can tell another person how to be happy. It is an individual
journey. However, there are some general principles to consider. Remember,
everything starts and ends in the brain. Yours. When replying to those
questions I typically suggest that one place to begin is by finding out all you
can about your family-of-origin. “But I was a foster child or adopted or
homeless,” you may say, “and I don’t know my biological family.” Since you are
a combination of nature and nurture, (nature representing biology and nurture
standing for the environment), review what you do know about either one or
both. Did you hear about any family history of happiness or unhappiness? At
conception you received some cellular memories from your biological ancestors
and from conception onward you began building your own memories related to your environment.
Remember, in adulthood many people either replicate what they know from
childhood or go for 180 degrees different (and I typically add that 180 degrees
from dysfunctional is still dysfunctional). Do you gravitate toward joy and
pleasantness or do you find yourself hanging out with those who are grumpy, unhappy
and unpleasant? If so you might want to take a close look at that. Studies have
shown that within the space of two to three years, humans tend to pick up the
habits of the four or five individuals they spend the most time with—and happiness
is one of the habits you can pick up. Happiness is a choice.
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