Gender Brain Differences, 4

Recently, a mother told me: “After listening to one of your presentations, I went back home and apologized to my 15-year-old son for telling him to stop fiddling and to look at me—for pretty much his whole lifetime--when I talk to him. He said, ‘Mom, when I fiddle with something I hear and really listen to every word you say. When you make me stop and be still and tell me to look at you, I shut down and don't remember a thing you say.’ My son and I both thank you. It’s been two days and our relationship is already better How come I didn’t know this sooner?” That’s one example of the reason I try to share current brain-function information with anyone in any way and anywhere I can. In this case, her son’s response does align with current research on differences between males and females. This is especially important when conversing with boys. It is often so much more effective to just sit down together, side by side, and chat while he is “doing” something. It can be as simple as playing with a Lego toy or running a little model car up and down his thighs or over the arm of the sofa or however an older boy wants to “fiddle.” Part 5 tomorrow.