Thursday, May 2, 2013

Nagging and Communication

Do you know any naggers? I'm not talking about the "nagging" at the back of your mind when you're worried about something. Rather the individuals who annoy or irritate others through persistent faultfinding or continuous urging to do something or other. According to Barbara and Allan Pease, authors of the book Why Men Don’t Have a clue and Women Always Need More Shoes, nagging is a term that is applied almost exclusively to females, although there are males who are naggers, too. Nagging is a human behavior that often occurs when one person wants another person to be different from who they actually are or tries to change the other person into someone he or she was never meant to be. If you are nagging a child, the child may perceive this as "attention." Negative attention is better than no attention and the child will likely continue to exhibit behaviors that result in his/her receiving more of the nagging attention. Nagging is likely a combination of inappropriate expectations combined with less than stellar communication skills. If you are the person being nagged, you may need to set your personal boundaries and kindly communicate to the nagger that their expectations do not work for your brain. If you are the nagger, think again. Do you know of any studies that have shown "nagging" results in positive change?

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