Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Absence of Narcissism

It’s “all about me” is a characteristic of narcissism. You often see this egocentricity in children and adolescents before their brains mature--and in older adults who have not 'matured,' either. Do they talk nonstop about their problems but respond with ‘that won’t work’ every time you make a helpful suggestion? How is your energy level after spending a relationship encounter with them? Do you feel drained or energized? It’s one thing to voluntarily do a random act of kindness, it’s another to spend your time dancing to someone else’s needy tune. No relationship is 100% functional and affirming all the time. Sometimes you give more, sometimes they do, especially when it ‘rains’ on your parade. There needs to be a balance, however, over time. If you are your friend’s primary resource or they get your attention through bad behavior or unwise choices, rethink the relationship. Relationships that are not healthy and reciprocal are like a mild headache. You grow accustomed to the pain and accept it as ‘normal’ over time, failing to recognize the increasing painful headache, sometimes until it because a 'brain tumor,' metaphorically. Nutritious food gives you energy; so does a nutritious relationship. More tomorrow.

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