Airline Travel, 3

• ·       After an extremely  hard landing, the flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, that was quite a bump and I know what y’all are thinking. But I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault..... it was the asphalt.”

• ·       During the final approach on a particularly windy and bumpy day, the Captain really had to fight to keep the plane under control during the final approach into Capetown. After a rough landing, the Flight Attendant said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to—wherever we are at the moment. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what’s left of our plane to the gate!"

• ·       After a less than perfect landing in Australia, the Flight Attendant announced: “We ask you to please remain seated with your seat belts securely fastened as Captain Kangaroo bounces us into the terminal.”